The Day I Fell into a Fairy Tale by Ben Miller
Author:Ben Miller
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Aladdin
Published: 2024-04-23T00:00:00+00:00
âGiddy-widdy,â he goaded, tickling under her chin. âRise and shine!â But Briar Rose remained out for the count.
Defeated, the prince put the feather back into his knightâs cap.
âItâs no use. Sheâs fast asleep.â
âWhat about kissing her on the cheek?â Lana said. âThatâs how my mom and dad wake me up.â
âKissing her,â repeated the prince, thinking it over. âNo, I donât think thatâs right. Not without asking first. And I canât ask because sheâs asleep.⦠Unless, maybe I could try a polite kiss on her hand?â
Lana and Harrison said they thought that was an acceptable idea.
So, leaning over, the prince planted a kiss on the back of Briar Roseâs outstretched hand. No sooner had he done so than her eyelids began to flutter, and she opened her eyes.
âDo excuse me,â said the prince hurriedly, as Briar Rose sat up in confusion. âMy name is Otto von Duresberg, first in line to the throne of Dreitsmark. I have come to rescue you.â
Lana cleared her throat and stared at the prince pointedly, who quickly added, âWith my companions, Lana and Harrison of Azupermarket.â He gestured toward Lana and Harrison, who waved awkwardly.
âDid someone kiss me?â asked Briar Rose, slightly put out.
âYes, sorry about that,â said the prince, with a nervous laugh. âThat was me. Just on your hand, though, but we were running out of ideas for how to wake you.â
âYouâve been asleep,â explained Lana.
âFor a really long time,â added Harrison.
âWait,â said Briar Rose, suddenly remembering. âThere was an old woman.⦠She was spinning and Iâ¦â Her voice trailed away as she saw the drop of blood on her finger.
âThat was no ordinary old woman,â confided Lana. âThat was the thirteenth fairy. The one who put the spell on you.â
Briar Rose looked at her blankly.
âDidnât your parents tell you about the thirteenth fairy?â
Briar Rose shook her head.
Lana took a deep breath and explained the story as she knew it.
âIf a fairy cast a spell on me when I was a baby, why didnât anyone tell me?â asked Briar Rose in disbelief.
âMaybe they didnât want to scare you,â suggested Lana.
âI need to speak with my parents.â
Briar Rose moved to stand up, but she was still weak from her long sleep, and as quickly as she rose, she had to sit straight back down again.
âPrince Otto,â said Briar Rose, smiling. âI donât suppose youâd be kind enough to help me down the stairs?â
When they arrived in the hall, instead of a roomful of silent statues, there was nothing but noise and confusion. Everyone had come back to life, without the slightest idea theyâd been asleep.
âWell?â bellowed the king. âWhere is she?â
âNot in the library, sire!â called a courtier.
âNot in the kitchen, either!â called another.
âGet back! Get back!â cried the queen, as the tall, thin butler arrived with the lit birthday cake. âItâs meant to be a surprise!â
âYour Majesties,â declared the prince, bowing deeply.
âSssh!â hissed the king. âWeâre looking for Briar Roââ
The king fell silent, seeing that his daughter had her hand on the princeâs arm.
âYour Majesties,â announced the princess, clearly enjoying the look of horror on their faces.
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Dark Humor | Humorous |
Satire |
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